Sunday, 28 December 2003

Happy Christmas!

Well, well, well boys and girls…was Santa good to you all this year??

It was definitely a quiet Christmas for me here on the Rock. And not quiet as inclement as I was expecting. In fact, the weather was downright warm and we had rain on Christmas Day, so I felt very much at home.

Had dinner at one of the neighbours for Xmas, and it was actually very pleasant. Ended up watching The Beatles Hard Days Night and I was surprised how much I loved it. The boisterous Brit. banter between the Fab Four was fantastic! Boo yeah alliteration!!! And then I had several days of the most wonderful holiday insomnia ever! I'm not even sure what time it is anymore, or what the outside world looks like. Everything shuts down here from 6pm Christmas Eve till the 27 th of December. So, if you have no wheels-or more specifically, no wheels attached to a vehicle-you're pretty much trapped for three days. Needless to say, I found I needed various packages of gum and bottles of water at the gas station down the block as it is the only place to go around here. I really might have to think about this whole “living in the sticks of St.John's” thing I've got going on. I've been slowly going mad. And the buses were running yesterday, but by then I had lost track of what day it was and was wondering why all my Christmas presents had been opened early and didn't actually go anywhere.

Besides, my Christmas isn't really over anyway. Thank the stars for those wily Orthodox Eastern Europeans and their Jan.6 th Christmas. My Ukrainian heritage has saved me from Christmas mishap, and I can actually send my prezzies to those poor suckers back home who actually call themselves my friends and family by “Christmas.” Heh heh.

And I bet you're all wondering about grades. Well, after one of the crappiest semesters I've ever put in, I actually managed to pull three A's and one B out of my asinine study habits. I must be the biggest keener in the world, because I'm positive that a large portion of those grades were pity marks by harassed profs tired of seeing my red head bob into their offices with yet more excuses for why something is not done on time. Phew. But I'll take it. I'm actually seriously thinking that grad school is more of an option all the time. Then again, without a master's degree, there would have been no point in coming here…so I guess it's not so much an option as a necessity. Damn!

I've been watching Monster Garage-uberguy show about tough biker-type men who make ‘monster machines' out of perfectly normal cars-and I suddenly have such an urge to smoke a cigar, get a tattoo and hit the local strip club on my Chopper. I must remember to balance Monster Garage with Home and Garden television in future.

What a strange holiday. I've done the usual crying and being depressed because I'm not with the family, as opposed to the other way around. I was actually forced to start a fight with myself on Boxing Day. It had something to do with how I think I know myself, but I really don't, and if I did know myself I would freak out, so I should really back off of myself before I found out something really awful and disappointing about myself, and that I shouldn't worry about myself so much, and get out there and live my own life. I don't remember too much after we started drinking, but I do know one of us woke up naked under the Christmas tree with a candy cane in a rather uncomfortable place.

I'm still not going anywhere till Monday. Even after all the cooped-up-ed-ness (sound it out people) I really have no desire to brave the dreaded Sunday Bus Schedule. I've already spent one Sunday taking the bus-or as I call it: exploring how many hours a Westerner can stand in the most frigid weather imaginable.

Alright. Well, I'm off to eat a turkey sandwich, as long as I can just BACK OFF MYSELF FOR A WHILE.

But I will get another update out for New Years.

Merry Christmas, y'all!


Sunday, 7 December 2003

The 12 month of 2003...

Okay, erm , yeah, alright.

Back off people, I know it's been almost a month since my last entry!!! Don't you know some of us have lives!!!

Yes, I know my having a "life" can be argued...but I really have been busy-major papers worth large parts of grade, studying for finals this upcoming week, and moping around. It takes a lot out of a girl.

Speaking of taking a lot out of a girl-props to ma BC livin', Newfy born, wonderful woman who just had a bun pop out of the oven!!

Congratulations ma darlin', and all the best.

Ok, so, what's up in Newfy town?

Well, I survived my first Newfoundland snowstorm! It was crazy-the snow was pouring down, and the wind was whipping the snow cross-eyed! Most of the day, the snow looked like it was flying horizontally. So, while many Newfoundlanders actually stay in, Fair Venus decides to get the heck out the clamshell and head to work. Not understanding the concept of those little beebly-bobs that drawstring your hood to your face, I had a few issues with snow filling my hood. At many points during my trek to the bus stop, I was wishing that I had packed rum and flares into my backpack. The snow was blowing directly into my face, and I had to stop frequently and wipe the ol'specs clean so I could see where the fish-tailing cars were coming from. Crazy man.

When I finally made it to the bus stop and could turn my back to the wind, it was fine. The snow hit my back so hard it felt like a nice massage through my jacket. Note to self: buy wind pants. They have these wind-breaker pants that you put over your jeans or whatever, and I need to get some. All was warm and toasty, except my jeans were soaked. Mmmm, wet jeans. Comfy-time!

But, I did not let the weather defeat me! I feel that it will be my greatest and most deadly adversary...but it will find itself hard-pressed to keep me down! At least until I actually have to go out in it...then there may be some sniveling and quiet weeping on my part.

Apparently the bus drivers also feel the weather should not defeat their mad driving skills. Taking the #1 to the university, we ended up fish-tailing half the way. A woman got on at one stop, and the back end of the bus was half-way up the curb, and she patted the bus driver on the arm and said "Got your winter tires on?" Bus McDriver shouts out, "Winter tires?? Who needs 'em?" and peels out with the tires squealing in the snow. I was frantically looking for a pen in my bag so I could scramble a make-shift will onto my arm.

Must admit, it is pretty though. When I'm in my apartment, which due to health violations I have recently scrubbed and sorted, and can see the snow outside, it is kind of nice and cozy. Then you realize that you're trapped and if you want to go anywhere you have to face cold and ice and it might snow enough to block your window and you don't have snow pants and you only have half a bottle of port...I mean, half a liter of milk...yeah...milk..

Okay, not a lot, but just enough to tide you all for a week. I know how hard it is to get through your miserable lives with out a little ME to help you along!

Wow, my head is suddenly so heavy...neck straining...nose touching keyboard...AAAAGH!!


Head shrinking...neck looser...nose facing monitor again. Phew, that was a close one... to study-for real-now.


Wednesday, 5 November 2003

Let it snow...

So, interesting. Very, very interesting. On Monday, I stepped out to go and catch my bus to school, and almost froze my non-existent balls off. Then, Tuesday, I bundle up, prepare myself for the worst, and head out. It's a tiny bit warmer, but there are these mysterious wee flakes of something whipping around in the wind. What are these small bits of flotsom? I ponder the conundrum, scratching my head frequently. Suddenly it comes to me.


Yes, boys and girls, it is snowing in St.John's! There were flurries all day, and finally, when the sun set and it got dark and cold enough, the snow stuck. I couldn't believe it, and yet I've been expecting it for a month.

I mean, September and October were beautiful! It got up to 26 degrees the day before Halloween. And now, my beautiful-almost-B.C.-but-not-B.C. weather is gone. B.C. has left the building when Newfoundland decided to show up after all.


Once again, I am amazed at the bizarre toad's-wild-ride driving skills of the St.John's Metrobus company. Today, as I was hurtled homeward, I was actually catapulted from my seat into a near standing position as the bus lurched around a corner at 400 miles per hour. It was only the extreme tension I placed on my outside calf that kept me in my seat. I have to make sure that I change sides on the bus regularly in order to prevent one leg developing huge, knotty calf muscles while the other becomes a weak atrophied thing. Then I'd be forced to concentrate when I walk or end up circling myself like a desperate wagon train.

And the level of conversation and weirdness on these bus routes is never-ending. On the wonderful below 0 Monday, it was nice to get on the heated bus when it finally arrived. But let me tell you, I didn't enjoy it half as much as the old geezer in the back.

"Boy, this bus is some warm!" "I tells ya, this bus is sure nice and warm." "It sure is nice to get on a bus that's nice and warm when it's cold out." "Ah, buddy, this bus is some nice warm."

This litany continued until I got off at my stop, and I assume it continued till he got home to the Mrs. and said:

"Ah honey, that bus I was on today was some warm."

There's also a mentally challenged little pervert who always seems to be going home the same time I am. He's a bizarre little man who finds the most attractive girl on the bus and then proceeds to tell her "cute" little stories and hug and try to kiss her. Everyone just laughs it off, but it actually gives me the creeps. I never thought being somewhat unattractive would ever be such a boon, but so far I've escaped his notice. Except once, when he was making reference to "big girls being good in the sack" and he winked at me. Buddy better keep his hugs and kisses to himself--I have no qualms about poking a mentally challenged pervert in the eye. A pervert's a pervert in my books.

(I bet a lot of you are writing that bit of wisdom in your journals and diaries.)

I'm slowly getting more organized. Still no luck finding a job--even though St.John's is peppered with my resumes and applications. It's very frustrating, and a little scary, but I'm surviving. Besides, as a "big girl" I can live on my own body fat for quite a while! I just hope we don't get snowed in and some of the other people on my floor get the same idea. I'll have to start spreading rumours about how tasty the elderly can be with the right spices.

Halloween was a sad bust. I spent it pleasantly enough, I hung out with one of the ladies on my floor and we watched scary movies. But I wanted to go to some of the St.John's Halloween festivities. There is a huge 3-day Mardi Gras, lots of haunted houses, a haunted hike (ok, we all know I wasn't going on that one!), all kinds of cool stuff. And I stayed home. The one thing Newfoundland constantly teaches me--I can get lamer. I thought I was pretty lame back home, but I've reached new heights in the East. I have followed the dimly-lit star, and found that it was only a street lamp.

Tomorrow is Guy Fawlkes night. There should be lots of bonfires and wildness for me not to attend. It is interesting that they actually celebrate it here though, being a mainly British institution. (C.R. will kindly note this as it is mentioned in Georgia Nichols.) We also get St.Patrick's day off, too. I'll bet that little pervert on the bus wears a shirt that says "Kiss me I'm Irish" and then enforces it!

Anyways, must get to bed so I can doze in all my classes tomorrow.

Yours always,


Wednesday, 29 October 2003

Lucky 13!

So, Halloween is only two days off. Am I excited...yes. Do I have any reason to be excited...yes. Does that reason have anything to do with eating Halloween candy and getting a sugar high...definitely!

Ok, so I have a lot of little things I could do, and none of them appeal to me. I could go downtown and check out the "mardi gras" that is held here on George St. (street of bars and pubs...and I'm assuming vomit as well), but all of the people I've met are going with groups of people that are as yet unknown to me, and that's not so good. I could always go by myself and check out the costumes, grab a coffee (or beer) or whatever, but that just sounds scary. And of course I'd never go off and do anything scary by myself. Ahem. I could watch horror movies with some people in the building. But it's kinda looking like even the elderly have plans. I could study and actually use my time productively...ok, you in the corner-stop laughing! (Oh great, now I'm seeing people in the corner...)

Ah, I'll figure it out. Things would be easier to decide if I wasn't so damnably broke! So far no one has responded to my battery of resume's and applications. Very frustrating! Don't these people understand that they are getting in the way of true genius! I mean, by helping to forward me, they would only be forwarding their own best interests. It makes sense, right?

Hmmm, it could be that they don't understand the magnitude of what has landed among them. Must eat more chocolate.

Must im press upon them the importance of aiding me in whatever way they can. Must also stop pretending to be an evil genius as there is no way to truly convince anyone that I am all that evil, or anything close to genius.

Ooook, I think it's time to sign off for another night.

And a quick shout out to N.M. and C.R., both of whom put me in my place about daylight savings time, and telling me that I did not actually lose an hour, but rather gained one. Thank you, and can I interest you in a rasberry :-P

Love to all who deserve love, and spanks to all the rest.


(Va Va Voom Venus Fangs)

Thursday, 23 October 2003

Homesickness Settles In

So, I'm a little homesick. Ok, I'm a lot homesick. Alright, alright, don't twist my arms--I'm so homesick I feel like mailing myself home. And yet...I wonder if I'm not doing the ol'bait and switch, self-sabatoge, I-don't-wanna-do-homework-no-more blues song that signifies nothing more than laziness and an inclination to "screw the pooch"!!

I mean, the fall colours here are breathtaking, the people are wonderful, the air is clean, blah blah blah freaking blah. I think I need a good coffee that isn't attached to Tim Hortons. Or I need to see some good ol'fashioned drag queens walking around. Or I need to go to a concert, or something.

I think my morning bus driver is causing all this angst. They have radio's on the bus here, and as you're driving around, they play one station or the other. All well and good if it's music you can tolerate, or if it's played at a decent level. However, at 7:10am, it is often not my favourite thing to be sitting on a bus listening to Queen played at ear-splitting volumes. I think it's a vain attempt to "wake us up." Sicko's. Now, the bus driver in question does not play the local oldies station, the local new music station, or any other local station of tolerable music. No, he plays the local elevator music station. I've never heard so many Casio organs, electic "beat" sounds or " Moon River " lyrics in my life. I mean, this is some old school stuff-often strident, seldom good. I love old jazz, lounge, blues. But this is a funk I can't describe-I mean it ain't even my mutha's music, know what I mean??

Hearing that first thing in the morning is bound to dampen even the most troopier trooper-isn't it?

And a sidenote-da mens are gettin' on my nerves. I'm wondering if there is a man alive out there who can talk reasonable about problems and not get wigged out. "Oh, ah, jeez, I don't know, I'm not one for giving advice, you might want to ask one of your, y'know, girlfriends about that one. Yeesh, wow, yeah, phew, really don't know..."Aaaaaargh! (Then again, most of my friends get on my nerves with advice because they PERSIST IN USING THAT DEMON SPAWNED LOGIC AND COMMON SENSE!!!)

By the way, since I'm on a rant, I hate the lottery because I do not win it.

Wow, ok, online diaries are good things. I feel like I've opened a window and all the clothes-eating moths have flown away, and wonderful fresh air is taking their place. And the knowledge that I have tainted those few (very few admittedly) loyal readers with my angst and negativity has let me know that pain shared is less pain for me to deal with!! Aaaah.

We also set our clocks back this weekend. So poor Venus loses another precious hour to da man! Blast! I could care less about coming home with the sun, I don't want to get up at 5:30 every morning. And I'm one of those poor literal bastards who can never for get that 7 was once 8 (or, that 7-8-9, ha ha), and live for the next several months waiting to get my time back. Time. Stupid relevance.

Well, tonight it TV night for me. I've worked out a sweet deal with one of my wonderful ladies from the floor (Shout out to da ladies from da floor!!)--(I know, I really have to stop....) and on Thursdays I go to her place and watch a little boob tube. I tell ya, I am a TV generation gal, and this is a little bit of sanity in my sea of weirdness. Yep, TV has made me the success I am today...ahem.

Well, I'm off like pants in the dark.


PS-any comments on this journal would be appreciated-and if you have any comments to make, or questions you want answered, I'll put it in here. Also, if you know anyone who might find this funny-by god, pass it on!


Sunday, 19 October 2003

6 days after my brothers birthday...

So, another week in the East has come and gone. Weather is still incredibly nice, although today it is raining and windy and generally gross. Weather is a huge topic of conversation in Newfoundland. You can experience 6 different weather patterns in a day here, so I suppose it makes sense to discuss it. It's a conversation that never gets boring. Unless you're from B.C.

My last midterm is tomorrow morning. Which is, of course, why I'm writing

this...procrastination at it's best! I've started counting crows. No, not the band, but the custom of counting crows that you see. It's a part of the folklore here, and it has a little rhyme:

One for sorrow, Two for mirthThree for marriage, Four for birthFive for laughing, Six for cryingSeven for sickness, Eight for dyingNine for silver, Ten for goldEleven a secret that will never be told.

It's very cool, and odd, and now I can't stop doing it. Thankfully, I've mostly seen either 2, or 5 crows. People here also "cross crows out," which is a kind of evil eye thing. They put two fingers together like a cross, and put it between the crow and them, thus-crossing out the bad luck the crow might bring. Not everyone does this of course, but a fair number of people do.

I now have a borrowed couch, and I can't tell you what a difference it makes to have actual furniture in your place. It makes me feel like more of a resident, and less of a squatter.

Thanksgiving was an interesting affair. I had dinner with an elderly couple and another woman in the building. I brought potatoes!!! (Yeah, whoopee) I have tried salt meat, and can't say that it will be a regular part of my diet in the future. It's freaking salty!!! And everyone thought I was on crack for thinking so, even though it's called "salt" meat!! There was also peas pudding. This wonderful concoction is basically yellow peas, cooked to sludge in a bag that's placed in boiling water, and then squeezed and mashed. It's very, very gross, especially for a poor picky eater like myself. But there was turkey, and gravy, and pie and it was wonderful to have a nice meal with new friends.

This is a rather short and pathetic entry, but I am studying here, people!! I'm not at your every beck and call, every wave and whim! Sheesh.

Anyway, as always, more to come.


Tuesday, 30 September 2003

Just another day...

Well, another day, another penny! It's been an eventful couple of weeks (har har) and I am once again feeling the need to share.

Was sick as a dog for a week, and am just now getting over it. There was some kind of freak flu going around St.John's, and it just wouldn't be me if I didn't catch it. Always one to follow the crowd! Yes indeed-why, if everyone started choking down small rodents like snakes (of which there are none in Newfoundland...)(snakes, that is...), and filling their pants with chocolate ice-cream before leaving the house, I'd be the sweetest-legged hamster-gorger around!! Alright, sarcasm aside, these Easterners contaminated me with germs, and I was dying a slow death on my birthday.

Yah! Birthday came and went. I am now 32, and once again the age seems to fit like a glove. It's strange how every year the age I turn seems to be the one right for me. I truly like my 30's. Not too old, not too young, juuuuust right. Although right for what exactly remains to be seen. Such is the lot of the late bloomer! You get into your 30's and wonder, what the crap am I doing?? How the crap have I survived this long?? And why the crap hasn't any of my friends said "What the hell are you doing with you life already?" instead of just letting me embarrass myself-like a zipper that's been undone the entire day you wear your Underdog Underoo's?? (Those of you who know Underdog, Underoo's, or the more conventional Mighty Mouse are at least as old as me!!!) So, how did I celebrate this momentous occasion? I sat around in my underwear, blew huge (and I mean huge!) amounts of snot into vast (and I man vast!) amounts of tissue, drank copious amounts of tea, and had one small cry. Sweet, sweet birthday bliss!

Actually, my neighbours dropped by with prezzies and cake. And I received a few birthday parcels, many wonderful birthday phone calls, and was able to have a truly valid excuse to catch up on much needed sleep. All in all, not bad.

University seems to be going alright. Or "going" at any rate. I seem to have slipped, ever so slowly tumbling, gently falling, leaning, leaning, into the deep well of procrastination. Again! I'm not too far behind, but it really does cause some trepidation to think that I have fairly easy courses and just can't get my work done. What will happen when I get to actual 3rd and 4th year courses? Or, dear Lord, grad school???

(Those who have noted that I am writing a long entry in a web diary about procrastination in order to actually procrastinate- give yourself a cookie.) Well, I suppose there's nothing quite like crushing failure, followed by mind-blowing debt, to spice things up a bit. [note: save just enough money for plane ticket to Cuba and "streetwalker" outfit for a "graduation present" to myself]

I seem to be fairly happy, despite occasional outbursts of homesickness, and really love the concepts of Folklore! I'm waiting to get into some really juicy stuff, which I don't think is going to happen this semester. But, as they say, you have to learn to roll before you slither, so I'm getting the basics under my rolls and mushing on.

Thank all the gods for October! It's one of my favourite months, so I should get more work done. It's a month long creep-fest, preparations for Halloween and El Dia de los Muertos, cooler weather (I hope!!), and a day off school (thanksgiving). Plus, my little webmaster/brother's birthday! He's getting old, too! Hooray!

Well, peace out and pip pip, and all that rot.


Thursday, 11 September 2003

9/11 (2003)

Well, Hello again m'loves! And how are you all doing?? Hope none of you are feeling crooked or sooky or anything!

*crooked: feeling crabby and childish. Ie: I already brought up one box from the car and no one appreciated it, and if anyone wants to get more boxes they can get them for themselves, cause no one appreciates me anyway, and I never wanted to bring the damn boxes up anyhow!

*sooky: Newfoundlander version of "sucky." Ie: chicken: cuddly; weepy; if I can't do it I don't want anyone to either.

Yep, I'm learning the lingo already! (Why those two words in particular I can't explain...)

So, school is well and truly started. All classes are going well, and I can actually navigate my way around this place. The Memorial tunnel system is interesting, though why someone would pay to have a slick, shiny coating on top of cement (nice for slipping on during rainy days, nice hard impact!) is beyond me.Professors are quite good, and I have a lovely (we'll see) job at the library.

Yep, I'm working in the Collections department of the campus library, and so far it's fairly fun and interesting. I'm just doing data entry and some searches on line and through the stacks, but it's not bad. The man whose department I'm in (History, Economics, Political Science) is a bit of a fuss-pot, and I can never work more than 10 hours/week, and never make more than $6/hour, but that's the only drawbacks. I'll just have to get another part time job and I should survive the winter. (Thank god I'm built for inclement weather!)

I'm meeting some interesting folks here, and it's wonderful hearing all the different accents. There are people at Memorial from all over the island, and the world. Every part of Newfoundland has different intonations and sounds and words and phrases. Very neato!

I have a couple of bits of Newfoundland wisdom for you all:

"Laziness ain't worth a fuck unless it's well tended." (Meaning: if you haven't done enough work to lay something by, you don't have time to sit around and reap your rewards)

"They're as thick as shit in a jug." (Meaning: NF version of "thick as thieves"--don't ask)

Well, that's all for now. I'm still sending this out from the wonderful campus computer lab, but my home 'net should be up soon!!! We are on Newfoundland time after all...

And hey, let's hear from you sorry MoFo's!! I have very little email or mail coming my way...(lazy bastards!)


Wednesday, 3 September 2003


God, how I miss that wonderful smile of recognition as you walk into a classroom and have the relief of seeing someone you know-can sit with-can talk to. For me, for now, it's just a smile of acknowledgement--yes, we've met eyes and the polite thing to do is smile and nod, or smile and mouth-without making actual sound-the word "hello" or "hi." And attempting to make conversation in these embryonic stages is a lesson in futility at best! (What a nice collegiate sentence!!) You ask about classes: do you have this textbook or that, have you had the prof. before, is this you major. Words trickle and fade and whisper out of existence, and silence just settles in again, except for those people who know each other and are enjoying the thrill of speech.

Bloody hell! Don't let me have to make a speech in front of this class of strangers! The professor hasn't even walked in the door and I'm strangling with fear over a presentation I don't even know if I have to give or not.

And I only have to go through this madness another three times today. I wonder if my poor heart will stand it?

(You can tell I'm nervous...I'm waxing poetic!)

Later:Thank all the gods and goddesses that have ever existed in the universe!! I do not have to give one presentation this semester!!!!

Now-for those of you smug pusses who perhaps don't like giving presentation, but still-like the brave little soldiers you are-get up there and muster up the courage to go for it: Fuck You! I'm not trying to be rude, but there is just something about presentations-at least as a student giving one-that are so bloody awful they make me want to retch and die! If I was a teacher in front of a class, an actor in front of an audience, or even an interviewee in front of a panel of interviewers (all of which I've been before, so I speak that which I know) I would find it easier to cope with.

But ye gods and little fishes! Those dull, vacant, zombie-like stares, glazed eyes, slack jaws, professor in the corner furiously taking notes as you speak, the horrible dawning realization that you don't really know what the hell you're talking about----the horror, the horror.

Yes, I know I have to get used to it sometime, but not now. New place, new culture, new school, new everything!! At least give me a semester, people! (Ha ha ha, as if that would actually help my speech phobia!!)

All my classes went well, with the exception of the first one. I had worked myself into such a lather that I ended up running out of class as the prof. lectured to run to the bathroom! How sad is that?? I certainly hope this will not be a regular occurrence. I spoke to the prof. later though, and we actually had a rather nice chat. I think he will fast become one of my faves, and I hope like hell I left a better impression with him than the one of me darting past him as he lectured!

And one last thing for this entry: this school was built in 1962 and looks it! I'm sitting in seats that are actually attached to the desk tops (and we're not talking lecture theatre here, just regular classroom desks). And I swear that someone has most definitely killed themselves in each of the bathrooms! (Not the same person, of course. A different person for each W.C.) I'll definitely send pics soon.

Well kids, I'm out of here. German homework awaits and I plan to use the facilities before class to try and save myself a bit of panic!!

The horror, the horror....

Tuesday, 2 September 2003

Falling forward...

Well, well, well, faithful fans. I'm back and almost ready for action! Let's here it for school computer labs: Hip Hip Hooray!! Without it, I would still be the voiceless little ragamuffin I've been for the past 2 weeks. And those who know me understand--that just can't be!!

So, I've been in Merry Ol' St.John's for about 2 weeks. I arrived on the 18th of August at about 1:30am Newfoundland time, all alone and confused as hell! There were people waiting at the airport for their loved ones, and I had a moment as I realized that no one was there for me. Awww, poor me.

The Newfoundland cab drivers, a blustery-mad-driving-but-kind-hearted lot soon took me in hand, and 2 or 3 of them got my bags into the boot, and my driver and I whisked away into the rainy Newfoundland night. He was very kind as I told him that I was not staying for a week or two, but at least 3 years:"Jesus Christ, my love, what the hell would you be wanting to do that for!"I told him I was a student and knew no one, at which he said:"Ah, my love. I have a friend as comes from Toronto. He didn't know no one when hecome, and just decided to go to the pub for something to do. Well, three weeks later it was his turn to cook everyone supper!"Very sweet. The hotel was a welcome thing, as I had a bath and a bed to recoup after my looooong day of travel. The next day I had another Toad of Toad Hall at the wheel, and we flew through the streets of St.John's, him pointing out the different places and the school, and me hanging on for dear life! Once again, the cabbie took pity on me and said that I'd make friends in no time, and hefted my 70 - 80 lb bags as if they were kittens! When I commented on his fine set of Newfie muscle, he took his hat off, turned red, wiped his face and said: "None of that, now, none of that." and ran to his cab and peeled off. Too cute.

So, my landlord is one of the sweetest men, and he's put the word out to the building that the poor student from BC has no furniture. So, it comes trickling in: a single bed, an end table, a wicker rocker, a stolen chair from the seniors room (landlord did this, not me!), a lamp. Soon I'll actually be a real apartment dweller again, and not a squatter!! And, I've taken to keeping a sharp eye on the garbage shed out back. It opens with an actual door, and someone actually threw out a perfectly good dresser! It just needs a bit of fixing on the drawers, which should be no problem. Yep, squatter, dumpster diver, penniless-I've really come up in the world!!

And, I already have a few friends in the building! A few older ladies on my floor get to walking around the park, and I am one pair of huffing lungs among them!! These women couldn't be more kind, gracious, and thoughtful. Without them I think I'd still feel like a piece of flotsam (or jetsom??) floating around like a dead seal in the Atlantic! Slowly, I'm getting myself aclimmated to the new surroundings.Though I was surprised to find that I have an accent! I never had one before, so I'm not sure where it came from...maybe the plane??

So, the next entry will be one of school and classes! And some pictures will follow very soon, as well.

Stay tuned to the same Puffin time, same Puffin channel!!


p.s.some Newfoundland terms (perhaps a whole section will follow as I gather these up)

"around the Bay" or "down the Bay"--anywhere outside of the city"decked out"--dressed up nicely, as for evening out"kick you in the cussocks"--not entirely sure, but it must have something to do with the male addendums

Sunday, 17 August 2003

This is the next post...

So, i'm sitting in the toronto international airport, writing this on the worlds stickiest, crappiest, most hard to push keypad! the flight was a blast, it was everything good that everyone said it would be, it wasn't scary or nauseating or anything. i think my family and friends will shudder to note that i may have developed a taste for travel.

Ye gods and little fishes-how weird is this? I can't believe i'm really here doing this. it's ten to five eastern time and my connector flight leaves at 7 40. then i'm actually in St.John's. wunderbar! It's so surreal to be here, surrounded by fellow travellers, looking out the window at all the docked planes, typing on a pc that probably has some mad, crazy germs on it. thank god for Purell!The weirdest thing about travelling for me is that I always connect with some form of fellow woman traveller. On the bus, it's usually little, old ladies telling me about grandbabies and lost husbands. Today it was a 13 year old on her way home from visiting relatives. She is worried about starting grade 8 at a new school, she really wants a rottweiler pup to name spike, and she loves her stuffed animals. She also has a 13 year old attention span and was almost going crazy with boredom by the end of the flight. she was very peeved and embarassed when the fight attendant told her she would have to be escorted to her mom, as she is underage.

The actual departure from vancouver really happened without a twitch, and though there was a few tears-you know who you are cryers!-i made it to the departure gate with little fuss. once through, i proceeded to act like a shaved monkey for the security staff, but they were kind and patient. I guess that airport tax of $10 really did pay for something.

So, i bought postcards and am going to go fill them out as i am just that lame.

Next entry will be from the rock itself! not sure when i can get it out, i'll probably hit an internet cafe somewhere along the way. Some new images will be forthcoming just as soon as time and money allow for picture developing.

So hello from t.o. and talk to you soon from the moon.

Venus Fangs, graceful traveller

Saturday, 16 August 2003

This is the one between 4 and 6

So, this is my last entry from the Western half of Canada for a while. My flight leaves very, very, sickenly early tomorrow morning. It's been a strange time, just preparing to leave, visiting family, etc. It feels like tomorrow nothing will change, everything will remain just as it has been for the past 3 years.

I'm wonderfully excited, horribly nervous, disgustingly sad, and just plain tired. Travelling back to the Lower Mainland today was exhausting, and I kept looking at the trees, especially those rainforest-y type things, looking at the mountains, and thinking how much I love it here. It almost makes me feel like I don't want to give any other place a chance, because I don't want to fall in love with other places that I will eventually have to leave. And yet, every new fit and start in my life is just so incredibly rewarding.

So, until next time boys and girls...

Goodbye from the West Coast and soon to follow-Hello from the East!

Thursday, 14 August 2003

Wait for it.....fourth...

Well, I'm feeling like quite the Space Age minx with myown little site! What a wonderful thing for such acomputer illiterate thing such as I.So, before I explain my self, I need to thank my lovely brother for putting this all together for me. He is my Web Master extraordinaire! If he hadn't put up with me and all my cracked out ideas it would have never been put up at all. His patience is endless. Although, it should be noted that it was only after he actually did what I told him that things came together.

And now, what the hell does "Venus in Fangs" mean, and why do I want to add my crap to the already glutted World Wide Web? Well, the name is one I came up with a while back and thought it was just plain cool sounding. However, I'm not exactly known for my "cool quotient." I do like the name; I think it has a gothic sound, and also has a strong feminist feel. You can think spooky, but Venus was also a goddess, and the "Venus of Willendorf" is the name of the oldest goddess artifact ever found. So, a strong woman-or woman as goddess-image is created, and the fangs only make her seem more angry and wild. Now, I never said that I was a weird, wild, angry, goddess-like creature. I think that might actually be too cool for my present sedate lifestyle. However, this leads into the second topic-why have a site at all?

My intricately carved rut is about to be abandoned for a huge new landscape. Leaving BC, I'm heading from one coast to the other to attend University. The farthest Eastern city in North America, St.John's, Newfoundland, will be my new home for a few years while I work at getting my Bachelor and Masters degrees at Memorial University. Very weird. Very wild. Very wonderful. Also very vomit inducing, but we won't talk about that right now. So, in making the choice to run off to the Maritimes, to go without knowing anyone there, without ever having left BC before, without any knowledge of what to expect-yeah, I'm feeling pretty mighty right now. If this keeps up it can only be a matter of months before I'm throwing lightning bolts around!

So this is the experiment: can I survive and succeed, or will I surrender? By having a general voice here I can keep all those loved ones, aquaintances, etc. informed of the trials and tribulations, the wee and grand successes, the ups and downs of this lab project.

Thanks for tuning in, and I hope you enjoy the exploits of your intrepid explorer Venus in Fangs!

Friday, 8 August 2003


Whoever said you can't go home again told the truth in a lying sort of way.

I'm visiting family until the big trek (only a week to go) and it's been rather interesting thus far.

I mean, we have our little tiffs, and my family still lives in the small town I grew up in-not a place I would ever live full-time again, and I shun the streets for fear of running into people I know from high school.

However, home as a feeling or where your family is-not so bad.

Although, it should be noted that I am extremely volatile right now. This feeling of love towards my family could just be the result of some odd chemical that is released from the brain in times of great stress. Yeah, that must be it.

Wednesday, 6 August 2003


I have no job.

Yesterday was my last day at my sad little cheque cashing job. I say it was sad, and don't get me wrong it was, but it's also gone. Like, gone Daddy! I don't have to serve mouth breathers who make the term "Lowest Common Denominator" sound like praise. However, I also don't get to talk to those few people who made that job worthwhile. And I have no money. Poo.

I have no home.

A few days ago my roommate and I moved out of our messy, but comfortable, two-bedroom. It was too much hard work, and I have to wonder if we were actually more stereo-typical and "girlish" if we would have had an easier time of it. I mean, even in today's modern, urban, gender-bending freakout, there couldn't have been two more messy, college frat, truck driving type chicks! Lazy? We prefer the word comfortable!

I now stay with above mentioned roommate in bachelorette pad royale, and am visiting family. Great, but also merde.

I have no money.

I have too much crap to do, and not enough money to do it with. I strongly suspect that my accountant has mishandled my funds. By "accountant" I mean "me," of course.


Saturday, 12 July 2003

First Post

Since I'm still packing, I'll bend your ear with a work story.

I work at one of those cheque cashing places-it will remain nameless-but you know the kind. It's a rather big and well-known place, and because of it's huge coporate-itude, they try to do little things to keep those grunts on the bottom rung feeling special.

Some examples:

1. They will give you little awards at certain times of year. These are printed to look like diplomas or degrees, and you get a $20.00 gift as well. They are for things like "Cash Handling" or "Team Spirit". In other words they are for "Nothing".

2. They have a company Christmas and Summer party. This can actually be fun...oops, did I say fun? I meant shitty. These parties are psychological experiments on what exactly a co-worker looks and acts like when he/she is drunk and sloppy, throwing up from too much turkey/sun, all the while being glared at by upper management. Weeeeeee!

3. We have something called a "Manager's Notebook" in which all our good and bad behavior are recorded by our managers. Little mistakes, big mistakes, times you helped out-all go in here. When I was in early high school I read "Little Men" by Louisa May Alcott, and Jo keeps a record of all the trials and tribulations of her "little men". This book makes me feel like a little man and I hate it. Besides, it's got to have a 3-to-1 bad-to-good news ratio anyways.

Aaaaaaah work! How I can't wait to get back to sweet, sweet upper education and leave you in the dust for another few semesters.